Can I throw in the towel?

This little girl is one busy momma...

and that's how I feel these days...

overwhelmed, stressed out, exhausted, stretched to the limit, completely and utterly spent! Whatever adjective I could use to describe my feelings this week would not even come close to the utter exhaustion that I feel. Luckily, for Korey, I haven't spent the bulk of my week in tears, yet, but I feel so close that they're threatening to spill at any moment! In fact, last weekend we were working on trimming our bushes and a branch fell and scratched my arm and I immediatley dissolved into tears...not because it hurt or because it scared me, but because I think my body just needed a release and that seemed like as good of a reason as any to cry!

On Monday night I met with some great girls who I'm doing a bible study with this summer and I shared with them a little bit of my overwhelmedness and one of them suggested that I just make a list and start crossing stuff off, that way I will be able to really see what is important and what is urgent and what maybe can wait for a while!! It seems like a no-brainer, but apparently a no-brainer that I didn't think of! Maybe that's how it is when you're so close to the "problem" you can't even see the simplest of "answers"! So, last night Korey and I sat down and made a list of all that we have going on right now and all the stuff that NEEDS to get done in the next few weeks or months and it felt so good to just get it down on paper! Plus, it made him extra motivated to get some of it started! :) (I think I finally get the reason for "honey-do" lists...I'm a little slow!) Then, as my attitude was making a slight change for the better, I got to spend some great time with the Lord this morning- since Hailey decided to sleep in until 7:15!! In our bible study we've been studying the book, "Lord, Only You Can Change Me" by Kay Arthur and it has been super good, but today was incredible and shot straight to my heart of hearts! The first paragraph was just this verse: "The Lord of hosts has sworn saying, "surely, just as I hve inteded so it has happened, and just as I have planned so it will stand...for the Lord of hosts has planned, and who can frustrate it? And as for his outsstretched hand, who can turn it back?" Isaiah 14:24,27 And was followed by a prayer by Kay that I have slightly motified and made my own: If it seems good to You, my Father, it seems good to me! Work it out all to Your glory and to my good!

I think I just needed to be reminded, this morning, that it isn't about me! It's not about all the stuff I have going on, the lack of sleep, the messy house, the shedding dog...all of that is a mute point- my grumbling and complaining was against the Lord! It was saying that His timing for all that was going on in my life wasn't good and that I wanted something different! I was letting myself get in the way of what God had planned for me and for my life- at this very moment!!! Who am I to say to the Lord, "Your timing isn't very good for me!" I don't know His plans or His purposes. My human finite mind can't even comprehend the dates and times of this Great and Amazing God that I serve, so why should I even try! At the end of the daily lesson we were supposed to share what we learned about God today and I just wanted to share with you a little bit of what I wrote: God has a perfect plan for my life an that plan is what is happening, right now!! All I need to do is bow my knee in meekness and surrender, because God(not me) is truly good and wise and all knowing. He knows all and sees all and hears all=I just need to trust His lead!! No matter how crazy and uncomfortbale it may be for me I can know that my God is a good God and is kind, benevolent and full of good will. He delights to bless me and takes delight in my happiness. My only job is to be happy in whatever His will for me is! So, I guess my answer if "no" I can't throw in the towel! But, I guess I really wouldn't want to! What better plan could I ask for than the one that God has worked out for me?? Nothing that I could come up with is better than that!